The “At Least” clause

This week has been full of sadness and emotion after the 3 tragedies in Florida. Monday was spend laying around the super messy space that is our house, processing the great losses from the weekend and overwhelmed with making the house “presentable” for the impending grandparents visit. Then the alligator attack happened and I seriously wanted to curl up in a hole with my kids and stay there. 

This week is also the anniversary of my fitness journey. My endocrinologist had told me in the spring of 2013 that I needed to change my lifestyle or I’d be back for insulin. It took me months to try new things only to abandon them a couple weeks later. Almost exactly 3 years ago this week a former coworker invited me to her challenge group to do a program I bought 10 years previous and had never used. 

So I chart my progress based on this week. I’m a metrics girl who needs to see results, and the results I saw were not exciting. I’m up 10lbs from last year and the year before. That means I gained back 10lbs this year. Who wants a coach who’s gaining weight not maintaining or losing it? I said to myself. 

We have a perspective in our house I call the “at least” clause. I say it a lot to the girls and this week, the week where I’ve been low and feeling sad, I see it coming out of my daughter. At least, Mommy, the rain feeds the flowers and gives us puddles to play in. At least the dog can eat what I spilled….

It’s been hard to talk to my kids about the tragedies, but at least:

  • We could have the conversation about bad people (the shooter) and good helping people (those who gave  others the shirts off their backs and tied off wounds)
  • We could talk about staying close and listening. And being aware of your surroundings (alligator boy was too little to talk to about this)
  • We could talk about false senses of security (I’ve been on that beach at Disney and never would’ve dreamed there were alligators there)
  • We can learn to embrace sadness and feel a richer joy (like the movie Inside Out)
  • We have the perspective to look for the good and find things to be grateful for.

The antidote for sadness is gratefulness.

At least that’s what one of my best friends says her therapist says. 

So as I lay here waiting for my liquid energy preworkout to kick in, I’m thinking about my own at least list in light of gaining back 10lbs:

  • At least it’s only 10
  • At least I’m still doing workouts almost every day (today will be day 55 in a row with no rest days, only recovery workouts and regular workouts)
  • At least I didn’t give up and gain more 
  • At least I’m still fitting in my clothes from last year
  • At least I’m feeling good (minus the scale)
  • At least I have a team of friends around me who encourage me to keep doing my workouts and eating clean. 
  • At least my husband is super supportive and reminds me muscle is denser than fat
  • At least it has become a lifestyle change. We all have down times and mess ups but it’s all about getting back to it and staying more on the wagon than off. 
  • At least…
  • At least…
  • At least…

The “at least” clause has become a great thing for us. Find the blessing from God, the silver lining. Figure out the good. 

What are some of your “at least” thoughts?

No shame Sunday

I’ve been reading a lot lately about mindset, fixed versus growth, and brain training (what conscious and subconscious thoughts are determining your emotions?). Marie Kondo talks about not keeping things out of guilt or fear and instead surrounding yourself with things that spark joy. 

For the last 3 weeks I’ve been pushing through a workout that I don’t love and isn’t my jam. Old me would focus on finishing because quitting is for losers. New me is about doing what I need to do to get back my jam and mojo. So tomorrow I’ll switch my workout to something else.  No shame in my self care game. 

Why do I make myself switch instead of quitting all together? That’s a good question. Part of it is because I have 2 little kids I need to raise. Part of it is I had to shoot 28 weeks of insulin 4x a day to have those beautiful little kids. Part of it is I like getting stronger and leaner. And part of it is that I need the endorphins to be happy for the rest of the day. 

Time to get some sleep and be ready for tomorrow.